The Clearing
by Atrox M
Summary: Tails looks back on an experience he shared with Sonic but there is a darkness to the memory. [Slash]


The Clearing  
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Short slashy fic. Stop reading if male/male relationships bother you. Don't flame me  
for writing this. If you read a yaoi story and then flame me about it then you're going   
to look a little bit silly.  
  
-Not really in the usual Sonic setting, sort of a vague civilzationless place with no   
specific time context  
  
-Rated R  
  
-Tails' POV  
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We'd play our usual game of where we would sit on the log over the lake and just listen   
to the birds and the trees around us. We'd take in nature hand in hand together, with   
nothing but the deep blue sky hanging over the crystal smooth water with us wedged   
between somewhere inside the terrarium of life.  
  
Sometimes if it was a nicer day, Sonic would leap into the lake and try to coerce me to   
join him. Of course me being the timid brat I was, I always procrastinated until he got   
bored with me and found something else to do. I'd be left alone on that log, sitting there,   
thinking about life, the trees, him...  
  
*******************************  
  
"C'mon Tails, try to keep up, we're almost there," he called back to me while zipping   
forward at the usual lightning speed he was able to attain, and I stammered forth clumsily   
through the air spinning my two tails as fast as they could just enough to propel through the   
pollen filled air of the forest.   
  
Finally he ceased in his movements and sat down in an open clearing where the sunlight   
was piercing through the tall wooden oaks and bathed a perfect circle of light into the   
center of where Sonic was sitting.   
  
"I wanted to show you this place, I guess it's sort of something special you know?"   
  
He always did charm me sometimes, just the way he'd talk, it was always so simple, yet   
smart at the same time. Like he knew all there was to know about life and was merely   
touring me through it with one hand in the other.   
  
"We're pretty far away from the village Sonic we should be heading back," I said   
fearfully, I did not like being far away from the others, but I guess that was just my   
natural animal instincts trying to protect me from danger. However here, the only danger   
around was not from a predator, not from mother nature, but from my own feelings.   
  
I looked at him as he relaxed into the soft green grass of the clearing, smirking at me as I   
stood there with an expressionless face, trapped in thought. He'd always give me that   
smirk, that one look that always burned into me, but at the same time confused me about   
what he was thinking.   
  
"What are you thinking about?" I finally got the nerve to voice my thoughts for once.  
  
"Eh, just life I suppose, nothing really important."   
  
There he went again, tossing out life like a petal trapped in the hand of the wind. Floating   
away without a care. That's what I liked about him, there were no worries in him. A   
carefree sensation could be brought upon anyone just by laying their eyes upon him, his   
blue skin and quills, in all of him there was an aura of comfort.  
  
"Come here and join me Tails," he called out chastely not trying to sound ridiculous. At   
the time I was taken back by his advance, but without word I propped myself down next to   
him and laid myself on the ground trying to relax into the surroundings of the trees.  
  
I stared up at the leaves on the wooden branches as they branched out and circled the   
clearing, the sun felt warm, bathing my fur. It was all surreal to me, but when I looked   
over at Sonic as he was looking back something sparked inside me. Everything was right   
at that moment, the feelings, the setting, everything. I could feel my insides burning like   
never before as I watched him smirk at me again, holding his head up with the back of his   
hand as he laid there and stared at me with those gazing eyes.   
  
With ease, not trying to startle him, I nuzzled against him, burying my face into his side.   
He felt so warm, all of it warm. I could have melted right there at his side as he put his   
arm around my soft fur. It felt so comforting, his warmth and the feeling his palm   
pressing against my back pushing me closer into him.  
  
We laid there for hours, never doing anything but listen to a song or two from a cardinal   
or blue jay, eventually dozing off in the evening and not watching the sunset, but feeling   
it as the cool breezes came in and ruffled my fur and stirred his quills. The western   
zephyrs from the horizon came in with the red glow and continued to blanket us as the   
warm yellow sun had done hours before.   
  
When night came he woke me up with a touch of his hand to my chin, bringing my eyes   
out of the daze they held when I was sleeping against his warm body.   
  
"We should be heading back now," he whispered into my ear softly, but I didn't want to   
go back, I wanted him to do more than just hold me. I wanted him to feel me, I wanted   
him to touch me in ways that I couldn't dare mention to anyone else. I knew the others   
would think of it all as wrong, even what we were sharing in the afternoons under the sun   
in the clearing, I knew that if they knew, it would only plant a frown on their face.  
  
But that only made it more special, it was as though we were escaping from civilization   
into the forest merely to hold each other.   
  
I looked at him as he played with the fur on one of my tails as he usually did, I let him   
twiddle with the strands of bristly brown fur, it excited me with a tickle as his fingers   
danced around. He felt me as I placed my hand on his chest feeling the warmth of his   
body even more, his heart was beating much faster than I thought it would be in such a   
relaxing environment. I looked over and I saw him sweating from the corners of his   
forehead, I couldn't believe what I was seeing.   
  
Nervously I brought my head forward, I had to know his true feelings, there was going to   
be no more procrastinating anymore. With each inch that I moved closer, I grew more   
nervous as my muzzle approached his.   
  
In no time my lips met his, connecting in an explosion of feelings that surged through me.   
At first it was soft and tender, but his hand moved up my tail to my body, placing itself   
on my stomach as I felt something I had never felt before. I could feel his tongue   
exploring around my mouth, feeling around, getting to know me better in a way that I   
wasn't sure I was ready for, but it all felt good. The warmth, the touching, all of it, it was   
all good.   
  
My hands lost control, I had already pulled off my white gloves hours ago. They were   
tossed lazily over in the grass next to me, allowing my hands the freedom of feeling as   
they ran down his chest. I couldn't believe myself, there was no control in anything as   
they went lower and lower approaching his navel. We were still embraced, our lips   
locked, his tongue still inside of me.   
  
As my hand went even lower down his body, he pulled away, his palm still placed against   
my beating heart.   
  
"We can't do this Tails...it's wrong, we both know it."  
  
My heart sank, his hand could feel it inside my chest beating faster. I knew he could feel   
the pain that ripped through me. I only wanted to love him and for him to love me back,   
but with his words it all shattered inside of me like broken pieces of glass mangling my   
organs with a crunchy pain that felt palpable even in the back of my throat.   
  
"But Sonic I...I love you, I...I want this..."  
  
"Stop," he replied cutting me off. "We can't let this go any further."  
  
"But why...?" I choked, trying to hold back the tears that I could feel were tugging inside   
my head wanting to burst out in an explosive fit of frustration, but I held back as my lip   
quivered.   
  
"I'm sorry I did this to you Tails...I'm sorry."  
  
As he got up I bit my lip even harder trying to hold back the pain and tears, I wanted to   
feel his hands on me again, his lips against mine, but what had happened just moments   
before, felt like a dream that was now withering away as most dreams did after you awoke   
with the dawn light.  
  
"Sonic..."  
  
But it was too late, he had already sped off in a blue streak that disappeared under the   
trees as the crickets began to play their song of the night. I looked around and soon all   
went silent. It felt as though nature was watching me, mocking me...they were all   
laughing at me. They had witnessed me in that clearing where I had my feelings squashed,   
my hopes trampled, and they were all laughing.  
  
"I'll show you." I growled as I cringed my teeth.  
  
Out of sheer blindness of what I was doing I stomped through the forest in rage, tearing at   
my gloves, ripping off the fabric with angry mauled tears. I wanted to rip them up, I   
wanted to rip up everything, I wanted to rip up my life itself.   
  
"If Sonic can't love me..." I choked as I looked towards the cliff that was beyond the   
clearing of trees. I must have been wallowing through the forest all night as I could see   
the sky was turning pink with the early sunrise, but the blue jays and cardinals were silent.   
Everything was silent except for a soft howling wind that led me towards the escarpment.   
It was calling towards me, leading me towards the answer to life, the answer to my hurt,   
the answer to my pain.   
  
The wind parted the fur on my chest as I stepped up to the edge, looking out towards the   
horizon as the sun rose. It was so beautiful, I wanted to be apart of it, not in the corporeal   
world, but in the ethereal, I had no purpose in life anymore as a living creature, I   
didn't even notice as tears matted the fur on my face. I took another step towards the   
jagged rock edge, my heart was beating even faster now, faster than I had even felt when   
Sonic was holding me against him.  
  
Now both my feet were lined up against the edge, I did not look down, but I knew the   
drop was thousands of feet. The wind howled louder as I tried to swallow my tears and   
cover my sobs, but it didn't matter anymore, who was I hiding from. I was only hiding   
from myself, I was only burying myself in pain.   
  
"Tails stop!" I heard a voice cry from behind me, it was Sonic's voice. Without moving I   
turned my head towards him as he looked back at me with desperation in his eyes.  
  
"It's too late Sonic..." I sobbed over the wind, "It's too late."  
  
"Tails what are you talking about, please...don't do this. I'm sorry I shared those feelings   
with you in the forest. I wasn't thinking."  
  
Another stab in my chest, this time it hurt even more. It felt like the dagger was being   
twisted into me as my face turned dead, the tears stopping out of mere shock of the added   
blow.   
  
"So it was all meaningless..." I sternly muttered, my tail twitching in anger.  
  
"Yes Tails, it has to be, it's just something that couldn't be and you know that," he   
replied with an equal amount of stiffness in his voice.  
  
"Well then," I gasped with an air of finality, "I guess I'm just something that couldn't be   
either."  
  
I turned my head towards the horizon and held it high as I looked at the rising sun. God it   
was so beautiful, the quiet subtle winds, the explosion of reds and purples in the dawn   
light.   
  
"Take me," I whispered out to the glowing beauty.  
  
"NO!" he shrieked as he watched me look outward towards the natural perfection that pulled me in.  
  
And in that moment I became weightless, my feet left the ground, but my tails did not   
spin for the purpose of flight, no, they drooped lifeless letting gravity take them as it took   
me with it. The tilt over the edge was magnificent, the beauty of nature taking me in her   
arms. I was apart of it all, in the air, soaring downward. For the last moment of my   
conscious life, I realized this is what I wanted, it was all perfect.  
  
The End. 


End file.
